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Thursday, July 26, 2012

Sexuality vs Morality

Mother is beyond being NOT Pleased this evening, she is down-right pissed.  Fortunately I have calmed down significantly from the blinding rage I was feeling last night, but I am still fucking pissed.  I shared a picture on Facebook  last night with a quote from Betty White in support of gay marriage and some blithering moron has the audacity to come on MY PAGE and say something to the effect of "Gay people need to go back in the closet where they belong".  Now if you know anything at all about me you should know that I do not tolerate that kind of talk.  EVER!  People do NOT belong in fucking closets!  Your fucking shoes belong in the closet bitch!  Your sick and twisted life view belongs in the fucking closet you worthless excuse for a human being. People should NEVER be put in a fucking closet!  I did mention I was angry right?

So Mother has got some things to say about "morality" today.  I am the first to admit that my "moral code" is probably not the same as a lot of people's.  And I will also be the first to tell you that mine is better, and I really do think it should be "the law of the land".  So in that way perhaps I am a hypocrite when I say other people shouldn't try to legislate their morality onto others, but there is one major difference, my moral code doesn't place any limits on what a person can do to themselves, unless it effects others.  What a person chooses to do to or with their own body is no ones business but their own, there is no morality or immorality involved as far as I am concerned.  For me, morality should be about how you treat Other people!

According to - Morality is "conformity to the rules of right conduct".  The "rules of right conduct" on my page are pretty clear - Don't type on My Wall if it is not nice.  By typing those hateful and hurtful words on MY Page she was the only one acting "immorally"!  Case fucking closed you judgemental fucking hypocrite!

All of this was pretty much a prelude to let me get away with talking about sex to be honest.  I am really uncomfortable talking about sex.  I mean REALLY uncomfortable, I don't even like to talk to my own husband about sex and we have married for almost ten years!  And yes, we have a very healthy sex life, I just don't talk about it.  But as uncomfortable as I am talking about it, I believe it is one of the most normal and natural acts a human being can partake in, and as long as you are not forcing it upon someone without their consent there is nothing immoral about it, ever (except in cases of adultery, but that goes back to how you treat other people). There is no right way to have sex.  There is no right or wrong in sex, except in whether it is consensual or non-consensual. Non-consensual sex is ALWAYS wrong and ONLY "immoral" for the aggressor, not the victim.

I do not care what you think "The Bible" says, or what your church leaders say, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being gay. If you really believe "God man made in his own image" and "We are all God's children" and all that, why do you assume he that he somehow fucked up when he made gay people?  Was he like "Ooops, sorry, didn't mean to make you love people of your same gender, but since I did now I will decide that you are bad for it" ?  Really?  You really think that way?  And you worship that guy?  That is so sad for you.

I am not gay, I think I have made that pretty clear.  I have never had any interest whatsoever in having sex with another woman.  It does not appeal to me. At all.  Ever.  That being made perfectly clear I hope, I think women are beautiful.  I was stealing my dad's Playboys and looking at the pictures when I was a teenager, and I still like looking at beautiful women, with or without their clothes.  And, truth be told, I don't particularly like looking at completely naked men.  I am sorry guys, but them balls are not attractive to me.  Wrap them up all nice and tidy in a pair of tight fitting undies and hell yes, I can drool over that all day, but I prefer the package be kept wrapped until it is time to put it to use.  Maybe I am strange.  I really don't know, and I really don't care.  The only reason I am even admitting any of this to the world is to make the point that it doesn't really fucking matter.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with it.  Even though it is not something I like to talk about, sex is a natural human desire that should be enjoyed.  There is a reason it feels good!  If something is natural, and it feels good, why the hell are so many people trying to stop it?  If there is a "God" and that "God" gave us orgasms, wouldn't it be worse in his eyes to demonize that gift than to appreciate it? Think about that one for a while.

My sexuality has absolutely nothing to do with my morality.  To me they should be two completely different subjects.  Yes, I had sex before I was married, hell, I had a three year old son by the time I got married, so?  What does that really have to do with anyone else's life?  I did not receive a dime of Welfare money before I was married either, so don't even try to go there.  I have had more than a couple of sexual partners in my life, most of which I never had any intention of ever marrying.  I am a 44 year old mother of six children (from three different fathers), and I enjoy sex.  So what?  I am married now, so that makes it somehow better?  One has little or nothing to do with the other.  The whole discussion is just ridiculous as far as I am concerned. Sexual repression has done nothing for this country but cause more problems, just like every other attempt to repress normal, healthy human behavior.  People should not be afraid of their own bodies!  And they certainly shouldn't be denied what little pleasure that this cold cruel world has to offer them.  To me, denying people joy, that is what is truly immoral!

I do not understand why some people are so insistent upon concerning themselves with other people's lives and bodies anyway.  If it does not directly effect you, mind your own damn business.  And if it only effects you because you have chosen to let it effect you, get over yourself.  People have sex.  They always have, and they always will.  And there is nothing wrong with having sex in whatever way you choose, as long as you don't force it on someone who does not consent.  Period.  End of discussion. I sure as hell hope I never see crap like that again, but sadly I am sure somehow that I will.


  1. Love it! My sentiments exactly!!!

  2. Thank you for coming out and saying this, I've shared this on just about every page I have.

  3. Wow!! We share a Lot of the same thoughts and ideas... I thought I was weird or maybe lacking in judgement of good and bad... Thanks!! I feel a sense of affirmation, and it feels kinda GOOD!! <3<3<3

  4. Very well said!! kudos to you!! hang in there kiddo

  5. Sexuality has no more in common with morality than morality has with ethics; less in fact. Stick to your guns, Mother. Remember the 'Moral Majority' is seldom either.

  6. You are SPOT on! Love this

  7. very well said,now if the moron who said that can read,i hope she feels like shit.sadly i don;t think she will.

  8. I love you for this!
    I hope that one day people will finally learn they have no right to judge others. Even for believers of the bible it should be clear: God is the only one who has the right to judge. And I think he will judge those who judge more than he will those who try to live their lives as best as they can.

  9. I think you are great, but about affect and effect: From Grammar Girl, here's a tip "the aardvark was AFFECTED by the arrow and the EFFECT was eye popping" - so as long as no-one else is AFFECTED, we don't care what consensual adults do in private!! Don't be mad at me, I can't help it, I'm one of those spelling junkies!!!

    1. Yes Dear, I knew I was getting that wrong, but I was too mad at the time to try to figure out which was which. Fortunately you knew what I meant anyway, and Thank you for the lesson, I will try to do better next time.

  10. Excellent blog post and my sentiments exactly. I am a Chrisian and I don't recall Jesus having much (if anyhing) to say about homosexuality which says to me it was a non-issue. Love rocks....whoever it is directed towards.

  11. Mother has hit the nail on the head! Perfectly! :) x

  12. Very true. People are ignorant busybodies that talk hateful shit because they are unhappy in their own lives or are to busy trying to push their own religious beliefs upon others. They need to leave other people alone,gay straight or otherwise and mind their own damn business.